Something for people good with relationship advice?

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This topic contains 2 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by Avatar of Ella Ella 12 months ago.

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  • May 9, 2012 at 3:09 pm #170214

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    May 9, 2012 at 10:36 pm #170271
    Avatar of tanushka
    tanushka
    Member

    Ouch, this is a tough situation. I’m very sorry to hear what you are going through. You are so young and this must be a sort of torture for you.

    If she is threatening you in any way, a good idea is to document that and share it with someone in a position to do something about it-  i.e. your parents/guardians/school counselor etc.  Let someone know what is happening so that later on if, god forbid, things get worse you have proof of her bad behaviour escalating.

    Only you can decide whether this relationship is meant to be or not. If I were you, for now I would limit ties from the family. There’s no need to be rude, if you bump into a family member, say hello and  move away. I would stop going around to their house/attempting to contact members of the family etc. Don’t call/fb/text/chat with someone who threatens you. Why put yourself into a hostile situation where you get treated this way? If things between you and your bf are good – then try and meet/hangout outside of his house.

    I know it’s easier said than done, and I hope this helps in some way. Good luck and stay safe.

    May 22, 2012 at 10:54 am #172024
    Avatar of Ella
    Ella
    Member

    Ok so i had a similar problem maybe i can help you. I had a lady at work and she was seriously bullying me. Put simply she decided she hated me and then that was it. She ridiculed me in front of people, and always shouted at me. I used to cry every day before i went to work cause i hated it so much. Whatever i said or did it was wrong.

    I meditated on what i could do to help and came up with two strategies

    1. I visualised meeting her in a safe place in my mind. I spoke to her and said, I love you and I forgive you and im sorry you feel angry. I gave her a hug and imagined her smiling back at me in acceptance.

    2. I went out for a drink with her. This sounds crazy but we went out with a couple of other people from work, and honestly it was AMAZING. Seeing me in a neutral place ( a bar) it was like  she was forced to see me as a normal person instead of this demon. All our inhibitions menlted away and she started seeing me as an ok person.

    A couple of weeks after this the transformation was unbelieveable. We laughed together, became friends. We actually went on to become very close! It was crazy!!!!

     

    now i realise her anger was to do with issues in her own life (she was adopted and in a foster home) i was just a vent in her frustration. I firmly believed both these strategies completely worked and im very proud of the outcome

     

    Try it and see!!!!! Hope it works for you!

     

     

     

     

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